Dear Marketing World:
- Not everything can be High Definition.
- The cheeseburgers NEVER look like they do on TV, and we all know it.
- When some Doctor in California stands behind your product, we can tell that you are paying them to do so.
- All those fat people…they didn’t lose 170 lbs. JUST by using your product. They ate right and exercised, as well.
- If you made millions by working only a few hours a week, then why are you on TV working your ass off trying to get people to send you money, and why do I have to pay you to get in on the deal? Shouldn’t you want to help the world be as rich as you are? Philanthropolize. (I just made up another word…)
- All consumers HATE rebates.
- Not even women enjoy feminine product comercials on TV.
Thanks.
kb9udr
Dear Hippies,
I am aboot 51% sure that it is you that did not pay attention in remedial science class, although there is a chance that it was a misinterpretation on my part. The Ozone “hole” is more affected by a few volcanic eruptions than any man made CFCs, BFCs, or LMNOPs. The affects of a hole in the ozone layer are felt by any living creatures that would happen to be under the hole. It is a good thing that the “hole” is right above antarctica where only a few stupid scientists are the only living things around. Maybe they should take off their big wooly coats and suffer the sunburn AND frost bite at the same time. Do some research on that, using my tax dollars. At least think of a more scientific name for something you made up. To me, global warming happens every year, right around April. It gets warmer out. All over the damn place. Well, actually it is technically just in the northern hemisphere. I will call this new phenomenon Partial Elevation Neglecting Ignorant Southerners. Summer for short, or maybe there is an acronym there somewhere…probably some hyperbole too.
My point: We, as humans, will never, ever, EVER!1!!!! destroy Earth. We may make it inhospitable for all life, but Earth will repair itself.
Iteresting observation that explains my life of confusion: I read, in the same magazine, seperate articles. The first was a hippy driven article about “Global Warming”. The second, on the very next page, was about how Earth is heading toward it’s next ice age. How can both be true? Science is F’d up! It is a guessing game. People actually get paid to GUESS what is going on around us. I need me a job like that: Weatherman, “I guess it is warm out today.” Doctor, “I think you may have the gout.” Sports Analyst, “I think that the Packers are going to win the Superbowl.” I have no sympathy for professional guessers and people who “practice” for a living.
Do you know of any other fun jobs that involve guessing, I guess I can’t think of any more…I must be out of practice?
kb9udr
*Sarcasm warning*
On my way to work this morning, I was following a newer Corvette. It was probably named Buela or some other lame car name. The damn thing had a freaking Jesus Fish right smack dab in the middle of the rear-end. A gaggle of thoughts flew through my head. First of all why. Why would anyone drive a Vette with a Jesus Fish on it? Also what. What is it doing for him or his car? Then how. How can I get that stupid thing off? Finally wonder. I wonder if I can just put my truck in 4-Wheel Drive, and drive over that stupid little car until my tire is on top of the fish, so I can scrape it off for him.
I think the Darwin Fish are one of the most brilliant come-backs in history. Then there is the worst come-back: The Jesus Fish eating the Darwin Fish. The symbolism is overwhelming. Overwhelming like a bunch of sheep dancing around in Chvrch(Christian Scientists spell church with a V instead of a U. Trendy, no?). Sheep following the sheppard. The sheppard asking for money. Dig deep in your pockets for the lord. The Lord of Your Pockets.
kb9udr
So this past weekend:
Friday night was not much to speak of. Saturday was filled with Diablo II. My cousin and I played up to level 13-ish. I forgot how much fun a 10 year old game can be. The grafix may suck wang, but you can’t argue with the raw fun-ness, replay-ness, or even the ness-ness. Saturday night, we went to the neighbors for her 40th birthday party. We had fun getting drunk and silly at the neighbors house. Being able to walk home is always a bonus and lends appeal to those festivities.
Sunday was fishing and football. A sporting day, if you will.
After going to bed, half in the bag, Sunday morning, at 0200, I was rudely awakened by my alarm clock at 0430. Not cool. Then my brain remembered that it was time to go FISHING. Woot! My friend picked me up and we headed to Pensaukee Lake. Bass were fooled into biting our lures, loons were fooled into chasing our lures underwater, and, get ready for this folks, I do not know how to use a digital camera. I. Me. One who owns a rather nice digital camera, and is experienced with many types of them. I cannot use the button that makes it take a picture. Next time you see me, ask me what kind of geek I really am. I will be forced to bow my head…
Oh well, I got to see a loon swimming underwater chasing after my buddy’s lure that he was using to catch FISH, not birds, or whatever a loon is considered. I liken them to the duckbill platypus. They have the bill of a duck, and the feet of a fish. The only thing missing is the beaver-like tail.
Loons.
kb9udr
Well, I got rid of the green, Matrixy theme. It was “too geeky”, as told to me by someone with the geeky handle of DungAroma. Go figure. It was also hard to read. I happen to like green text on a black background, but I am nostalgic when it comes to computers.
Now, you can choose your own background by clicking on one of the thumbnails at the top of the page. I can even add in whatever backgrounds that you prefer. I will probably rotate them once in a while after I get bored of the existing ones. Bwryboy will especially enjoy the bamboo background. It will probably make him hungry for one of his famous sushi rolls, which he makes himself with his own bamboo mats. For his next trick, he will make “Tex-Mex Sushi Rolls”. Patent that before it is too late…
Additionally, I upgraded to Wordpress 2.0.4.0567899261346235, or something. I LIKE IT ALOT! I can do some really cool things, now, so stay tuned.
Send me some backgrounds that you would like on this site, and I will accommodate you as best I can.
kb9udr
I have not laughed this hard in a while.
Even without the funny word, macerate, this post is full of humor…well, humor that I appreciate, anyway.
kb9udr
This horseshit site just got geekier. I hope I just made up a new word too.
kb9udr
