Super Geek

Best engrish commercial EVER!

Click me!

I got ridiculed for laughing at this for 15 minutes…I only watched it 5 times…and not just for the scenery. Someday, If I ever get my wish to go to Japan, I will probably die from hilarity poisoning. Just plan on never seeing me again if I ever tell you that I am getting on a plane to Japan. I find everything they do to be extremely funny. They have signs telling men not to pee in the streets. There are signs warning people about perverts. On the next street you will find vending machines with undergarments in them.

All you’re funny Japanese things are belong to us.

kb9udr

Halloween is one of my favorite days of the year. Not for all the normal reasons, maybe not even for the right reasons. This is my favorite day because I have an excuse to scare small children.

A couple years ago, I scared these 2 kindergarten kids, they dropped their candy on my porch, and ran to their parents at the end of the driveway. The parents thought it was funny. So did I… The kids had to be brought back up my driveway in their parent’s hands, and I had to take my mask off before they would aloow themselves to be dragged back to their candy bags.

Last year I scared some kids mother. The lady was tying her kid’s shoes, and I opened the door so quietly that she never heard it. When she stood up to knock on the door, I screamed at her, and boy did she ever scream back. Then she laughed and told me that I almost had to clean up pee off my porch.

That was worth the 2 hours of 18 year old kids that think they should get candy from me. I think this year I might just throw it at them, or not give it out if they LOOK over 12 years old. Wal-Greens is right down the road. Go spend your allowance on your own damn candy! Mine is for little kids…not young adults. I especially like the ones who don’t even wear a costume. They just show up and ask for candy. Smack!

Sometimes I feel bad if I don’t look outside, before opening the door to scream at children, and scare that crap out of some 2 year old. I feel bad for the parents when the kid is still screaming at the next house, and wants to go home. Oh well…it is Halloween after all. Like I said, “sometimes” I feel bad.

Hopefully, in a couple years, my oldest daughter will get “too old” for tricks-or-treats, and stay home to hand out candy. Then I can do some crazy kid scaring crap. I’m talking “jump off the roof and land next to kids” kinda crazy stuff. First I have to perfect jumping off the roof and not breaking something. That would be fun, though. Even hiding in the bushes and running after kids would be fun. Maybe I’ll just set the candy on the porch and see how many kids can actually go NEAR the candy. I could climb my tower and throw candy-corn at them, but that might be just a bit overboard.

I always hear kids talking on the road about the guy at “that house” scaring them every year. They keep coming back, though…so it must be as fun for them as it is for me. Maybe I should work at a haunted house…now there’s a career. I wonder if they have any openings. I can see myself searching hotjobs.com for a haunted house job. Wanted: People who have control issues, and need to scare people once a year. Click here to apply…LOL! Monster.com would be the more appropriate job search engine, I think.

If I don’t do the haunted house circuit, I will probably become a carnival worker.

My future is SO bright, I gotta wear shades.

kb9udr

My sock, almost brand new, has a hole in it.
The little piggy that had roast beast is sticking out.

Maybe it is time to move to CA, where I can wear Jesus Shoes to work, and save money on socks. I would miss ice fishing too much, though.

There’s a hole in my sock, dear Liza, dear Liza

kb9udr

Driven By Boredom

I only looked at a few of the cartoons so far, but I laughed at each one with increasingly more gusto as they went on. I’ll have to wait until I get home to fully checkout the site. It will probably take me some time, and for as funny as it looks, I will probably scour the place. My friend over at Slavish Emulation sent this to me. Mad props to him for the link.

Check out his blog.
It’s…umm…interesting.

kb9udr

Both have M’s, O’s, and I’s in them. This is where the friendship ends, and the fight at the bike rack after school begins.

I cannot get Wordpress to look good in IE. Something is always wrong. The code is perfect, meeting standards, and the CSS rulez. IE just will not play nice. I think it is the CSS, mostly…based upon past experiences…IE is not friends with CSS. It looks OK in IE, just not perfect, like in Firefox. My anal retentiveness has it’s downfalls, I guess. I had to delete an entire post, because the way it looked in IE was causing me to develope a twitch, and there was no way to fix it.

If you are viewing this site with IE: Beware, it looks all wrong, sort of.

If you are viewing this site using Firefox: You are viewing perfection…sort of.

kb9udr

I only wish I had this much time on my hands…

WoW update:

I have achieved the NEARLY unachievable. My warrior finally got a mount. A 60% speed increase, in game or IRL, is wonderful! It only cost me 90 gold, and 3 weeks of running the same instance dungeon over and over and over…

It hasn’t cost me my marriage yet.

Yet.

This was a few days ago. Last night I checked my auctions, did a battlegrounds run, and became suddenly bored with my warrior. I guess running through the same dungeon for 3 weeks will do that. My cousin and I decided to try playing our humans again. My mage and his rogue. I forgot how to even play my mage, and got teabagged by a bunch of ogres for the first 30 minutes. Then we went to do one of my special mage quests, in Desolace, and have kinda stayed there now. It is a new and interesting place, for me, so it should be fun for a couple levels.

Being that life is generally unkind to me, BOTH of our human characters have to pay for mounts. Unlike our undead characters, of which only mine had to pay for a mount. So it will take us twice as long and twice as many dungeon runs to accumulate 90 gold each. Maybe I deserve this fate…

I realized it had been a very long time since we had played our humans when this joke was funny to me again:

A man walks into a bar saying, “I’m a teepee, I’m a wigwam; I’m a teepee, I’m a wigwam.” So I said, “Relax, man, you’re too tense.”

All apologies.

kb9udr

My spider-sense is telling me that I may be turning this site into the official “I will find all funny Engrish.com items and link them here.” type of blog. I hope I am wrong…but damn these are funny.

Click me!

Batman Begins:

I bought, watched, and basked in the glory of this movie. I have seen it twice since Friday. My son went into his toy-box, or somewhere, and found his batman action-figure after watching the movie. He now walks around the house playing with Batman, and telling everyone, “I’m Batman!”. He even makes the action-figure fly around. I have to get him a new Batman toy that has a cape…I think he would love it.

Anyway, the movie is cool. So cool, in fact that I have to say I liked it better than Tim Burton’s Batman, which WAS my favorite Batman movie of all time. Jack Nicholson will forever, in my mind, be THE Joker. Even when I watch him in other movies, I still think of him saying, “This town needs an enema!”, and have difficulty with any character he plays other then Joker.

I will not spoil your experience by giving details, but here’s a quick review: This movie details where Batman came from, how he got to BE batman, and why. The story is amazing. The special effects are believable, and give you a feeling of Batman being ghost-like in the ways he attacks criminals. The technologies used for Batman’s suit, tools, and Bat-mobile are very real world believable. That is the other thing that made this movie so cool; it made you actually believe that someone could do all that stuff.

I felt 12 years old again watching this movie, and the time spent with my son, sharing Batman, made it even more special. He asks to watch it with me everyday…and I just might take him up on it again soon.

I’m Batman!

kb9udr

War is what…?

I had to put my hand over my mouth and pinch my nose shut when I saw that. As soon as I saw the pic I knew that the laughter dam would burst all over my LCD monitor, and I don’t like wiping spittle off of monitors.

So, last night I managed to wrangle all the guys over to get our D&D group started. Steve is going to be the paladin, because God made him do it. Matt the sorcerer, because he likes to scrutinize his ability scores for TWO FREAKING HOURS. Bob the rogue, because he likes to do it from behind. Kevin, who I met for the first time ever last night, is the ranger, because he enjoys handling(fondling) animals. Josh wasn’t there, but is going to be the cleric, and I am sure some god(Cthulhu) made him do it. Joel was not there, but our group needs some muscle, so I will be asking him to be a barbarian…roar.

I look forward to DM-ing(killing) them. We have a fun group of guys, and were actually able to set a date to play. Now if everyone will actually come to the game, life(fantasy) will be sweet.

In other news: I did not quit smoking. I wouldn’t know where to stick the patches. I cannot follow directions, either. I commend all persons that have this power…the power to quit.

kb9udr

Here there be Dragons!

Click the link to see some pictures of my bearded dragon. I have had him since June 2005. He is about 5 months old-ish. I really NEED to build him a larger habitat. I am planning on a 6′L x 3′W x 2′H. This should give him a fairly decent living space for the rest of his days. Right now he is in a 20gal long tank, which is different than normal 20gal tanks. It is shorter, but longer, allowing him room to hunt. OH, and hunt he does! Crickets of the world ph34r the “Jaws of the Dragon”. I should make a short film about that. I’ll bet it would win one of those gay film festivals.

Intoko:
Mence:
Veling:	Nordy:

Here’s Intoko acting like the cow that he is: